It's All Happening So Fast

Guys! It's happening, it's all happening and so quickly! This past weekend I performed in my Level 4 show at Second City with my incredibly talented Conservatory cast, watched so many of my closest friends take the stage in their final Conservatory Graduation show, and On Hiatus just made the leap from improv to sketch.

A year ago I was just starting the conservatory. I was surprised, terrified, excited, and more or less clueless as to what the year had in store for me. A year ago the idea of writing a sketch was completely incomprehensible. I didn't know the first thing about writing a sketch. I didn't know what types of sketches their were or even how to generate ideas for them. Yet, here I am in the throws of writing two different sketch shows. Just this week alone I have to write 2 black outs, 1 needle drop, and a relationship scene. Heck, this time last year I wouldn't have even understood 90% of those words.

I feel only feelings of awe and gratitude to my Conservatory class, Bad Reunion, for kicking ass and having a blast at our second show this past Sunday. From kids with polio, to salty nuts, from crazed milkmen, to bloody knees this cast does everything 110%. (PS the bloody knee was mine, I died a bit too dramatically. There is nothing quite so jarring as standing on stage and glancing down at your legs to realize you have a trail of blood all the way from your knee to your ankle.) I can't even wait to see what our next show has in store. We have two weeks to put together some rad sketches and I have no doubt this group will go above and beyond as always.

Remember this group of crazy kids?

Well 5 of them just graduated from the conservatory at Second City and I couldn't be more proud of them! 

And now the 7 of us will be embarking on a great adventure together that we have been talking about, dreaming about, and planning for over a year now! That's right On Hiatus is writing our very own sketch show! We just hired and incredible director, Tiffani Swalley, who has already pushed us to create some pretty fantastic sketch comedy!! So in the next couple of weeks we are going to perform at Midnight Melt so we can submit our work to Sketchfest. And even if we don't get into Sketchfest we hope to have a run in the Skybox in early spring of this coming year. 

And in other news I got bangs! 

I guess, needless to say, lots of things are changing and it couldn't be more thrilled to be on this ride!

Just a Basic Girl Who Loves Fall

Recently I have seen a lot of blog posts and articles out there circling the web commenting on and poking fun at white girls who love fall. Let me tell you something, I don't know why other white girls like fall so much and I am not even sure why I like fall so much, but what I do know is that since I pulled my peacoats and scarves out of storage a week ago I can't stop smiling.

According to Buzz feed there are Things All Basic White Girls Do During the Fall so I picked out my favorites to see how I measure up to all other basic white girls based on my love of fall.

1. "Get on the Pumpkin Spice Latte grind"- Well I don't like coffee.... but if I did I would probably be spending my paycheck on some PSL goodness
2. "Filter the shit out of the trees as they change colors"- You know I don't actually have a single picture of the trees changing colors, however, I think I will have to take a couple this year because they are just so charming. 
3. "Buy some 'fall' candles and burn them until the entire house smells like an autumn walk"- Ok, yes... I actually stock up on 'fall' scented candles so that my house can smell like an autumn walk all year long. 
4. "Take a picture with a pumpkin they spent all day searching for"- No, but only from lack of opportunity. Growing up we always had the choice of the cream of the crop pumpkins from my father's garden... as an adult however I don't even know where the closest pumpkin patch is aside from the box of pumpkins in Trader Joe's. 

   

   Throwback about 7 years to the Heyday of Dad's pumpkin patch

5. "Buy anything that says Pumpkin Spice on it"- Not anything... but I may or may not have purchased a pack of pumpkin spice Pillsbury cookie dough last week.
6. "Coordinate Halloween costumes with other basic white girls" - I have done this since high school....

   

   Secret Agents! 

7. "Express their excitement for the season with photoshop" - I don't even know how to use photo shop
8. "Make cookies with their kitchen aid"- That would require me to have a kitchen aid, or at the very least not eat all the raw cookie dough of the Pumpkin Spice cookies I just bought
9. "Crunch dead leaves in Ugg boots" - Crunch leaves? Yes. Ugg Boots? Nope.
10. "Take engagement photos"- I am not engaged, if I am being honest, though, I could see getting married in the fall... 
11. "Abuse the hashtage #thankful"- I have never used it before, but by golly I am #thankful for fall
12. "Make sure that everyone who comes over to their house knows that it is indeed fall"- See #3 about fall candles
13. "Throw a pile of leaves in the air for instagram"- Isn't that the best part of fall! I used to spend hours raking the leaves and jumping in them with the neighbors as a kid! And now to find a tree. 
14. "Complain about how cold it is while wearing a Northface"- Look here Buzzfeed... you don't know me! 
15. "Stay out all night Black Friday shopping" - Something I have actually never done is Black Friday shop... Do I start this year? who knows... 
16. "Turn a Friday night into a Jack-o-Lantern carving party"- Ok, who hasn't done this? 

    

    We used to throw the greatest Jack-o-Lantern carving parties

17. "Throw a festive Friendsgiving"- Only the best Friendsgiving for the best friends! Remember this? 
    
18. "Wear an infinity scarf, take a selfie in it, then never take it off for the rest of the day"- Minus the selfie I am fairly certain this is me on everyday in fall. 

Ok Buzzfeed... I am a white girl and I do in fact love fall an awful lot. So what? I am not ashamed of it, I am not afraid to admit it! And if anyone has a problem with that they are not invited to my Pumpkin Spice, fall candle, Jack-o-Lantern, friendsgiving, Fall Party! 

The Things We Do For Kids

Many of you who clicked on this link might be expecting a beautifully written piece about how much we sacrifice for our children because we love them so much. However, I am not a mother and I am grossly under qualified to write any article that is touching especially about children seeing as I do not have any. The closest I can come to talking about that is to postulate at the endless amount of things that my parents did for me.

But Alas, this is purely a post detailing the most ridiculous things I have found myself doing as a full time nanny.
I am currently taking care of a 5 month old little girl who needs constant attention, not because she is upset, but in fact because she is happy. So if I take my focus off her for more that about 60 seconds she begins shrieking, a sound that would put the the Howler Monkeys at the zoo to shame. Because of her need to always have my completely undivided attention I have devised increasingly creative ways to keep attention while getting other things done (like eating, cleaning, or gosh forbid preparing her food).

So here is a list of some of the most ridiculous things I have found myself doing in any of the several nanny positions that I have held in the past 5 years:

• Improvising an entire lyrical dance to Hallelujah, specifically the Shrek version
• Wearing plastic spoons over my eyes and grass in my hair because I "look so amazing" and should "get married like this"
• Pretend to know way more about Star Wars than I actually do so as not to be outsmarted by a 5 year old. 
• Doing the Tango to Ke$ha music
• Really doing anything and everything to Ke$ha music
• Carrying on full conversations with myself as two different characters 
• Talking to an infant as if they are a fully educated adult with fully formed ideas and opinions
• Singing Disney songs in Character voices
• Using various parts of my body as percussion instruments
• Making up the most absurd nicknames just to keep kids on their toes. Like Sassy Pants, Sweet Potato Head, Mocha Choca Latte, Goober, Pookie, Etc...
• Making my face do things no other human being should ever see
• Making my voice do things that no other human being should ever hear 
• Reading out loud high brow news articles and books, because Goodnight Moon is so overrated

Case and Point: Somebody woke up early from their nap before I was done writing

Truly I enjoy my job so much and who else gets to try out characters, sing at the top of their lungs, and dancing like an idiot in a totally judgement free environment? The answer is not a lot of people, and for that I am eternally grateful that I get paid to be this ridiculous.